Creating Positivity During Adverse Life Events

by Ruchi Pritam

ho knew that adversity could ignite an exciting opportunity, or that an extremely debilitating personal challenge would lead to pursuing a passion?

I hail originally from the eastern state of Bihar, India. I received my law degree in Delhi, and my young family moved to the southern state of Tamil Nadu, where my husband is a government officer.

This time of my life was already demanding — raising a family, working as a lawyer, freelance teaching and devoting time and energy to relatives. But I was in for a shock when I ended up with a debilitating stomach ailment. Not only was it painful, but it took three years to be diagnosed, and even then there was no respite. Seeing the worried faces of my kids, I realized that I had to find a way to manage my illness. While I had extreme limitations with food and physical activity, I needed to reassure them that I was capable of supporting them just like any other mother.

It is this phase of life that taught me the meaning of a demanding life and the value of life. I reduced my work and number of teaching hours. I only accepted legal work that I could manage from home to cope with my extreme lifestyle limitations. I devoted more time to understanding my options to bring about positivity even during troubled times. Little things like keeping more potted plants on the balconies, interacting with friends and colleagues, and reading a greater variety of books helped.

The Way Forward:

A few years ago, I attended a talk on the architectural wonders of Chola temples by a renowned expert in the field. The presentation was uninspiring, and ironically, it was this aspect that was the catalyst that directed me to pursue a personal passion—sharing the rich heritage of India.

I made up my mind to write about the magnificent temples of India in such a way that people could connect with their history and take pride in the work of the ancients with better understanding. I was always fascinated by the ancient monuments of India, and I could feel my inner self telling me to go ahead and start writing.

I already had a blog where I posted gluten-free vegan recipes, recipes of dishes from Bihar and a series of short stories about a little brown girl who faces various challenges and overcomes them through her own innocence.

One of the numerous pillars with micro-scale ex-quisite carvings in the Darasuram Airawateswara temple.

My blog became a new source for sharing the uniqueness of India. I visited the three grand Chola Temples in Tanjavur, which were built in the 11th and 12th centuries C.E. and are now UNESCO World Heritage sites. I collected stories and information from temple priests, local visitors, government personnel and publicly available writings. I captured pictures of what I found spectacular as a tourist. I wanted my writings to not only help in enhancing a reader’s understanding of cultural heritage, but also to facilitate emotional attachment with these heritage sites. Pictographic writeups can do this. With my visual stories, I included historical details and architectural features to bring to life the magnificence of temple sculptures. These articles were appreciated by my colleagues, friends and even a respected curator of a national museum in Delhi.

I am now travelling extensively to collect materials for my writings. My friends wonder how I manage to travel, as I am unable to eat most food in hotels and restaurants. I have learned to manage the situation by carrying some prepared food that I can eat, such as millet muffins and fried flaked rice. I have also become quite an expert in having detailed discussions with waiters in the hope of finding food that will not have an adverse impact.

I am still coping with this debilitating illness, but I am not allowing my spirits to falter. I am determined to travel despite my frail health and rigid diet restrictions in order to achieve my dream of popularizing the historical wonders and majestic heritage of India. I try to maintain a style of writing that satisfies both the historian and the layman alike. I strive to ignite awe and appreciation for the great architectural wonders with which many have sadly lost touch.

The Learning:

Overcoming challenges is not easy. It requires hard work, willpower and self-confidence. One has to free oneself from limiting beliefs and trust in oneself.

My writings have given me the opportunity to share my passion for temples across broad audiences. I have also had the opportunity to provide content for 120 artifacts that have been displayed for the beautification of the Chennai International and Domestic Airport. The work required extensive research and perseverance. The task was satisfying, and it boosted my self-confidence.

My journey has included an invitation to give a presentation, The Impact of Art and Literature on the Digital World, at the ALL Chennai Chapter of the Women Economic Forum, where I was able to connect with inspiring women and share my own adventures.

My passion has also taken me to Ayutthaya in Thailand and Angkor monuments in Cambodia. At present, I am writing articles on the ancient remains in these lands. My article on Angkor Wat has been appreciated by many readers and renowned Indologists. I plan to write more articles about these magnificent ruins and their connection to ancient Indian civilization. It is fascinating to observe how these faraway lands have been shaped by the Indic religious thoughts and stories carried by ancient travelers. My passion continues to grow as I delve deeper into my chosen field, as there is so much to learn and share.

I firmly believe that life can be fulfilling even when circumstances impose limitations on one‘s capacity to live with full freedom. Through my own experiences, I have tried to help others reorganize their priorities so they can manage their adversities in a better way. Taking up a new hobby or pursuing a dormant passion can be more fulfilling when the usual paths of career and growth seem impossible due to unexpected hurdles. I have learned that we can overcome these seemingly raw hands dealt by fate and find our own niches in life.

Photos by Ruchi Pritam & Kumar Jayant, ©2019