Mastering the Four Abilities of Exceptional Leadership
by Nonna Babitzin
F

or a decade now, I have been coaching executives from different fields, countries and cultures, successful men and women between the ages of 35 and 65. Coaching has become my art of connection, and leadership growth my passion.

I have had the privilege of taking this journey with many successful leaders, of witnessing their heartwarming courage, vulnerability, maturity and magnanimity. I have proudly followed the careers of my clients and invited them to share insights from their journeys with other leaders. During my work, I have noticed two repeating patterns:

  • Leaders who have good intentions but are unable to translate those intentions into action, ultimately exhibiting poor leadership
  • Leaders who master their abilities, turning their exceptional leadership into exceptional results

Exceptional leaders exhibit many abilities, but I would like to highlight the four most crucial abilities that will help you avoid common pitfalls and warmly push you to become a leader who creates exceptional results.

Exceptional Leadership
Four Success Factors of a Leader
1. The ability to respectfully bring up difficult issues
I personally found this quite difficult to learn, due to my tendency to avoid conflicts and display good manners. But once I did, I realized that respectfully bringing up difficult issues is actually at the core of good manners and is the best way to avoid unnecessary conflicts. Getting comfortable with uncomfortable feelings like disappointment, frustration and anger is one of the most important habits a leader can develop.

But even when we recognize the importance of this skill, we often make unbelievable efforts, consciously or often unconsciously, to avoid these feelings. Fear of the reaction – others’ or our own – often elicits avoidance techniques. We procrastinate bringing up the difficult topic, hoping the issue will magically disappear. We get so busy we “forget” to bring it up. Or we tell ourselves it isn’t really that big of a deal or, in true avoidance, step away from our personal responsibility to give light to the issue. To the detriment of all, we believe our own stories.

Getting comfortable with uncomfortable feelings like disappointment, frustration and anger is one of the most important
habits a leader can develop.
Learning to accept my own avoidance, and learning to sit with the uncomfortable and respectfully bring up difficult issues, did not happen with the mind but with learning the compassion of the heart. Without compassion and gentleness in your eyes, bringing up difficult issues can suffer from criticism, blame or lack of clear values.

2. The ability to nurture trust
Understanding the correlation between trust and business results has been essential for my clients in understanding the importance of trust even during the most difficult times. In the current business environment, it is not the big who defeat the small but the agile who prevail against the slow. When trust is strong, we can communicate and make decisions quickly. Transparency increases clarity, and positive emotions feed innovation and drive. This reduces costs and improves the bottom line. On the other hand, lack of trust creates friction and disrupts decision making, information flow and our connections with each other. With lack of trust, everything slows down and the willingness to take risks and ability to innovate disappear. This quickly brings costs up and business results down.

Trust is a decision. The leader who needs others to first prove they are worthy of their trust misunderstands the power of leadership. We lead by our example, not by our expectations. If we want our organizations to have trust in us, we need to show trust in them first. Without the ability to nurture trust, all the other leadership skills are useless.

3. The ability to stay curious
Leaders who partner with me for a coaching journey are already exhibiting courageous curiosity in their own development. We explore their thinking patterns, assumptions, biases and the inconsistency between what they know about leadership and what they actually do. This self-awareness is at times uncomfortable and even painful. Reflecting on and questioning your own stories requires curiosity, not only about yourself but about humankind, about realities, perspectives, self-honesty and the fascinating way our minds work. This inner work is crucial to the maturity of leadership.

I have seen leaders who have done plenty of inner work but lack the curiosity to do the outer work. Some are unwilling to explore the impact they have on an individual, cultural and systemic level, unwilling to encourage feedback and invite real growth. Letting go of the ego and noticing how their behavior affects others is crucial. Instead of thinking your employees work for you, leadership is humbly being grateful your employees work with you and trust you to lead. Leadership is about building your character and your curiosity to support and nurture your employees’ growth, which leads to business growth. This does not mean you are not setting ambitious targets, but instead of demanding better performance you inspire people to outdo themselves.

Curiosity will enable you to respectfully use the full potential of your team and grow your business as well as your own abilities as a leader. Lack of continuous curiosity to learn and stay open to different perspectives will prevent you from thinking strategically and utilizing the contribution of others. Leaders who live the leadership that results in business results have already learned the power of curiosity. Instead of having all the answers, they seek to ask powerful questions and invest in supporting collaborative learning within their organization.

Curiosity will enable you to respectfully use the full potential of your team and grow your business as well as your own abilities as a leader.
Grow your business
4. The ability to create clarity
One of the repeated success factors of successful businesses is the clarity and focus their leaders create. Not only on goals and roles, but on the essence – the magic – that makes their company special. The question of “What is the magic of your company?” always challenges the executive to explore what really makes them different from their competition. Each company has a strategy and values, but if we put the strategy and values of 10 companies on the table and remove the logos, we might not know which logo should be on what paper. The magic, on the other hand, is the spirit of the company that brings clarity and meaning to everything achieved. The leader who is able to pinpoint and create clarity around that magic can make the company succeed and grow.

The language of leadership is clear and action- and future-oriented. It lacks blame, excuses, demands and mistruths. Impactful leaders are fully present where they are and have learned the art of active listening. They do share their perspectives, intuition, thoughts and ideas, but only when it serves the learning and forward movement of the team, not their own ego. Leadership brings clarity and certainty. If your being, doing or communication creates insecurity, uncertainty, confusion or suspicion, you are not leading.

Leadership is understanding. When you want something to be different, you need to become different. And for this you need to make sure you have the ability to respectfully bring up difficult issues, nurture trust, stay curious and create clarity.

Nonna Babitzin
Nonna Babitzin is a senior executive coach. She supports experienced executives in building their character and finding the factor that makes them an exceptional leader, creates sustainable change and lives the leadership that results in business success. She currently leads two companies, Adare and WRX Company. Outside of her work, Babitzin enjoys traveling and spending time with her four children and her granddaughter, whose laughter is pure beauty for her soul.

coachingwrx.com

adare.fi/en/executive-coaching

Nonna Babitzin is a senior executive coach. She supports experienced executives in building their character and finding the factor that makes them an exceptional leader, creates sustainable change and lives the leadership that results in business success. She currently leads two companies, Adare and WRX Company. Outside of her work, Babitzin enjoys traveling and spending time with her four children and her granddaughter, whose laughter is pure beauty for her soul.

coachingwrx.com

adare.fi/en/executive-coaching